HALLOWEEN II Review

Rob Zombie should stop making films, plain and simple. HALLOWEEN II is a joke, the work of an amateur. Rob Zombie himself looks scarier than his movies. He should walk around on a normal street in the daytime and that would be… more frightening than all of his movies combined. But he can be proud of something though, HALLOWEEN II has gone down in Cinematic history as part of the many sequels that stink worse than rat’s fart.

It’s that time of year again, and Michael Myers has returned home to sleepy Haddonfield, Illinois to take care of some unfinished family business. Unleashing a trail of terror that only horror master Rob Zombie can, Myers will stop at nothing to bring closure to the secrets of his twisted past. But the town’s got an unlikely new hero, if they can only stay alive long enough to stop the unstoppable.

Let me just save you the time and money and break down the movie in a simple sentence.. it’s all about Michael Myers attacking somebody from behind. Zombie’s Michael Myers just loves using axe or a big ass knife to whams the victims’ backside or grab ‘em by the hair. Frankly, we get tired of the same damn method, this isn’t the 1930s where audiences back then would shout at the characters on the screen yelling ‘look behind you!’

I do have to give HALLOWEEN II this though, it doesn’t have a slow start, as a matter of fact, what could be the ultimate ending of Myers chasing Laurie is now put in near the beginning parts of the story by Rob Zombie. But that’s still not enough to forgive all the crapola that happens afterward. As far as dialogue goes, there were some lines that probably could relate to today’s lingo and that’s only because I’m guessing Zombie always has a pen and a pad and just catch the everyday joke and conversation that he and his scary lookin’, bearded face friends have on a regular basis. But everytime I hear Scout Taylor Compton saying ‘I’m Michael Myers’ sister’, it feels like somebody is raking his nails across the blackboard.

I feel sorry for Brad Dourif who plays the sheriff in this movie, the man was in One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest, he was excellent in Deadwood and LOTR: Two Towers, what in the blue hell is he doing in a Rob Zombie movie, the same thing goes for Malcolm McDowell (The Clockwork Orange). Still, being talented actors that they are, they give 110% percent for their characters in HALLOWEEN II, quite possibly the only decent thing about this sequel.
Rob Zombie intends to scare his audiences some more for the second time around but what he gives them is a slow-paced, predictable movie that has lost its fear effect.

I think the blame is on Zombie’s wanting to tell some more about Myers’ origin. Who gives a f*ck about Myers’ origin, when you watch this kind of movie, nobody wants to know about ghost mom or inner child or what motivated Myers. People just want to get scared… but because Zombie wants to incorporate the so-called family is forever theme, the story drags and doesn’t have enough life-threatening moments. I admit, I somewhat enjoyed the previous installment and only because of that last scene where Myers was chasing Laurie all over the house, now that was fun, HALLOWEEN II, on the other hand, just has to have a ending that indicates the sister finally embracing her dark side, what an amateurish concept.

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